This subject totally came to mind this morning on my lunch break at Starbucks. I glanced over and saw this bleach blonde gentleman with his perfect, off washed jeans and flip flops, with sunglasses worn on the back of his head. Immediately I thought, “Hey, it’s a douchebag.” I realize I just described nearly every man on the planet, but there was something about him, I can’t quite put my finger on it. It made him douchebag.
Now normally, the term Douchebag is used in the context of an a-hole or mother f word. But I wouldn’t go so far as to say I am using this term in that context. I am using it as a fashion term! Like Metrosexual or Hipster. So….back in the day, I used to read Seventeen Magazines. This was about 2005? There was an article called, “Am I Emo?” I still have it! This thing is still hilarious! I tore it out as an example of how NOT to dress. With this said, I wanted to write a similar comparison, called, “Am I Douchebag?”
The Douchebag List:
- Wearing Sunglasses on the back of your head, probably accompanied by a head of hair that is lighter than your skin…Overly tanned skin
- Polo shirts (with collars popped….is that still allowed?)
- Anything by Abercrombie & Fitch, extra points if the logo is dead obvious
- Showing off a woven belt, with your shirt tucked in only in the front
- Khaki pants with flip flops
- Any type of off washed or purposely torn jeans with flip flops
- Spiked hair
- Sport backpacks to show that you work out all the time (make sure your protein powder is visible)
- Matching your entire outfit, all the way down to your belt.
These are just a few of the fashion qualities of a Douchebag! If you really want to see the style in its natural habitat, swing by an Abercrombie and Fitch. But make sure you wear a gas mask or something to cover you face, so as not get high by the noxious fumes :) And by noxious fumes I mean the nauseating scent of cologne that has crop dusted the store and its surroundings.
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